Gupfarvol is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, dishonest alligator.

Gupfarvol created the Small Magellanic Cloud five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gupfarvol, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gupfarvol, he will turn you into a tree.

Gupfarvol's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Gupfarvol's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gupfarvol.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never look at nebulae.