Wapnellcuss is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, annoying gerbil.

Wapnellcuss created an up quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Wapnellcuss, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Wapnellcuss, he will turn you into a dog.

Wapnellcuss' most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Wapnellcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never laugh in the presence of geese.

4. Wapnellcuss loves goats, so they must be respected.

5. Always obey Wapnellcuss' priests.