Bamtagab is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, omniscient shark.

Bamtagab created time and space five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bamtagab, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bamtagab, she will send you a sign.

Bamtagab's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Bamtagab's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate ants.

2. You must love Bamtagab.

3. Never talk about pigs.

4. Feed all hungry sheep.

5. Always help mites in need.