Vonstaflat is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, prudent dolphin.

Vonstaflat created an electron six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonstaflat, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Vonstaflat, it will turn you into a rat.

Vonstaflat's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Vonstaflat's Holy Commandments

1. Vonstaflat loves gulls, so they must be respected.

2. Do not eat turnips.

3. Never go into fawn rooms.

4. You must pray to Vonstaflat three times a day.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.