Midlabfig is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, dishonourable newt.

Midlabfig created the Sunflower Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Midlabfig, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Midlabfig, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Midlabfig's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Midlabfig's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Midlabfig.

3. Never go into gray rooms.

4. Always help sick ducks.

5. Never hurt birds.