Citdapneg is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, blissful scorpion.

Citdapneg created Mount Everest nine million years ago.

If you believe in Citdapneg, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Citdapneg, she will turn you into a rat.

Citdapneg's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Citdapneg's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed coconuts to monkeys while wearing orange dresses.

2. Never paint your legs indigo.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never play with disobedient children.