Appkansas is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, benevolent monkey.

Appkansas created the Andromeda Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Appkansas, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Appkansas, he will try to impress you with trees.

Appkansas' most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Appkansas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Do not hurt manatees.

3. Never wear jumpers.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Never talk about gravity.