Bifgilhitnan is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, tranquil seal.

Bifgilhitnan created water seven million years ago.

If you believe in Bifgilhitnan, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bifgilhitnan, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Bifgilhitnan's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Bifgilhitnan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

4. Ants are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Bifgilhitnan loves snakes, so they must be honoured.