Nancisston is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, slow penguin.

Nancisston created the planet Earth two billion years ago.

If you believe in Nancisston, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Nancisston, it will turn you into a snail.

Nancisston's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Nancisston's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nancisston.

2. Never go into gray rooms.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Do not take Nancisston's name in vain.

5. Never write about black holes.