Dutbapbif is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, proud alligator.

Dutbapbif created an atom nine million years ago.

If you believe in Dutbapbif, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dutbapbif, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Dutbapbif's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Dutbapbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear yellow tights.

2. Never mention seals.

3. Never think about nebulae.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not eat nuts.