Cumrakbat Largmutvag Stafraknul is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, humane scorpion.

Cumrakbat Largmutvag Stafraknul created a photon eight million years ago.

If you believe in Cumrakbat Largmutvag Stafraknul, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Cumrakbat Largmutvag Stafraknul, it will send you a sign.

Cumrakbat Largmutvag Stafraknul's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Cumrakbat Largmutvag Stafraknul's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed bread to tortoises while wearing black shorts.

2. Feed all hungry whales.

3. Never paint your legs violet.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.