Dossbappodtip is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, bad-tempered raven.

Dossbappodtip created the Cigar Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Dossbappodtip, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Dossbappodtip, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Dossbappodtip's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Dossbappodtip's Holy Commandments

1. Dossbappodtip loves ants, so they must be honoured.

2. Erect a large lead sculpture of Dossbappodtip on top of all buildings.

3. Never laugh in the presence of gulls.

4. Always help rats in need.

5. Never eat green fruit.