Wigsaslinfotvag is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, caring swallow.

Wigsaslinfotvag created the planet Jupiter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigsaslinfotvag, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wigsaslinfotvag, he will turn you into a goat.

Wigsaslinfotvag's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Wigsaslinfotvag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear purple clothing.

2. You must pray to Wigsaslinfotvag nine times a day.

3. Dogs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.