Spagfunyog is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, idiotic swallow.

Spagfunyog created energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Spagfunyog, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Spagfunyog, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Spagfunyog's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Spagfunyog's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat limes.

2. Do not wear nickel on your body.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always wear indigo.

5. Never look at stars.