Lenpitcun is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, able penguin.

Lenpitcun created the planet Earth eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lenpitcun, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lenpitcun, she will destroy your favourite star.

Lenpitcun's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Lenpitcun's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear jumpers.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Lenpitcun.

3. Never run in the presence of cats.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.