Ster is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, irritating unicorn.

Ster created tapeworms three million years ago.

If you believe in Ster, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ster, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Ster's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Ster's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt swans.

2. Never wear skirts.

3. Never mention mice.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.