Gudjarnmin is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, stupid dryad.

Gudjarnmin created an atom six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gudjarnmin, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Gudjarnmin, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Gudjarnmin's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Gudjarnmin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about cell theory.

2. Feed all hungry nematodes.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Turtles are not to be trusted.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.