Nutbudxen is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, emotional donkey.

Nutbudxen created snails six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nutbudxen, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Nutbudxen, he will curse you with boils.

Nutbudxen's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Nutbudxen's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five sheep approach from the south.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nutbudxen.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not sing in public.

5. Do not shave your hands.