Carfum is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, charitable swan.

Carfum created the Sun eight million years ago.

If you believe in Carfum, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Carfum, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Carfum's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Carfum's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear pink tights.

2. Never wear shirts.

3. Never paint your chest purple.

4. Never look at comets.

5. Never think ill of sick hamsters.