Bigwegten is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, fussy crow.

Bigwegten created the Whirlpool Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Bigwegten, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Bigwegten, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Bigwegten's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Bigwegten's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear magenta.

2. You must pray to Bigwegten nine times a day.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. You must love Bigwegten.

5. Do not stand on grass.