Mobbutvon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, strong cow.

Mobbutvon created the universe two million years ago.

If you believe in Mobbutvon, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Mobbutvon, she will throw large rocks at you.

Mobbutvon's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Mobbutvon's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. You must never eat pineapples.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not kill bats.

5. Mobbutvon loves sheep, so they must be respected.