Linwapgum is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, unselfish eagle.

Linwapgum created the Black Eye Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Linwapgum, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Linwapgum, it will remove you from existence.

Linwapgum's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Linwapgum's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Put Linwapgum first in all things.

4. Do not wear mauve clothing.

5. Do not make images of living things.