Cumtafhas is a god.

It takes the form of a small, selfish squirrel.

Cumtafhas created the Virgo Supercluster four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumtafhas, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Cumtafhas, it will turn you into a tree.

Cumtafhas' most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Cumtafhas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Cumtafhas must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not kill shrews.