Yatzimjig is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, duplicitous fox.

Yatzimjig created an up quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yatzimjig, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Yatzimjig, she will turn you into a worm.

Yatzimjig's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Yatzimjig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never eat bread.

3. Always help bats.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not shave your neck.