Yogcutpon is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, awe-inspiring coyote.

Yogcutpon created the universe five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yogcutpon, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Yogcutpon, he will boil you in a big pot.

Yogcutpon's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Yogcutpon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always make sure there are no tapirs in a building before entering it.

4. Always obey Yogcutpon's priests.

5. Never talk about cell theory.