Geptapvon is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, resourceful hare.

Geptapvon created tapeworms nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Geptapvon, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Geptapvon, it will destroy your home planet.

Geptapvon's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Geptapvon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Hide from red birds for they are unholy.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.