Flabfatweefum is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, selfish dingo.

Flabfatweefum created matter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabfatweefum, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flabfatweefum, he will have a low opinion of you.

Flabfatweefum's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Flabfatweefum's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Always make sure there are no shrews in a room before entering it.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Flabfatweefum loves great tits, so they must be respected.

5. Retreat if eight dolphins approach from the south.