Sabcabdam is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, omnipotent raccoon.

Sabcabdam created matter nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sabcabdam, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Sabcabdam, it will ignore you.

Sabcabdam's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Sabcabdam's Holy Commandments

1. Put Sabcabdam first in all things.

2. Erect four tin sculptures of Sabcabdam on top of important buildings.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not wear brown clothing.

5. Always stare at clouds.