Fudcimbat is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, egotistical tapir.

Fudcimbat created a top quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fudcimbat, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fudcimbat, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Fudcimbat's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Fudcimbat's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always help sick foxes.

4. Never hurt badgers.

5. You must love Fudcimbat.