Afgarnut is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, self-assured swallow.

Afgarnut created tapeworms five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Afgarnut, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Afgarnut, it will be very sad.

Afgarnut's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Afgarnut's Holy Commandments

1. Always help bats.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Erect six titanium sculptures of Afgarnut on top of important buildings.

4. Never paint your neck white.

5. Do not drink alcohol.