Flaglitxuck is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, selfish lobster.

Flaglitxuck created bats seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flaglitxuck, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flaglitxuck, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Flaglitxuck's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Flaglitxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in brown rooms.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Never look at black holes.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate gulls.

5. Do not commit murder.