Pinflabcap is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, egotistical alligator.

Pinflabcap created the planet Saturn nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Pinflabcap, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Pinflabcap, she will manifest in front of you.

Pinflabcap's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Pinflabcap's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate sharks.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.