Jatgutrot is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, kind crocodile.

Jatgutrot created viruses two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jatgutrot, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Jatgutrot, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Jatgutrot's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Jatgutrot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill capybaras.

2. Run away from white hamsters, for they are unholy.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Jatgutrot on top of all buildings.

5. Do not covet oxen.