Yartflatmig is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, bad-tempered jellyfish.

Yartflatmig created everything that exists six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yartflatmig, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yartflatmig, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Yartflatmig's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Yartflatmig's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear purple scarves.

2. Always help sheep in need.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never talk about whales.