Nigjinruttikqueegarmbaf is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, prudent jackal.

Nigjinruttikqueegarmbaf created the universe three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nigjinruttikqueegarmbaf, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nigjinruttikqueegarmbaf, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Nigjinruttikqueegarmbaf's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Nigjinruttikqueegarmbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate monkeys.

2. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

3. Worship no other gods but Nigjinruttikqueegarmbaf.

4. Never talk about stars.

5. Never wear shoes.