Catbamtimlit is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, duplicitous snake.

Catbamtimlit created Mount Everest six billion years ago.

If you believe in Catbamtimlit, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Catbamtimlit, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Catbamtimlit's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Catbamtimlit's Holy Commandments

1. Catbamtimlit must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Catbamtimlit.

4. Do not wear lead on your body.

5. Never wear magenta trousers.