Fonfemgess is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, vain bee.

Fonfemgess created humanity three billion years ago.

If you believe in Fonfemgess, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Fonfemgess, it will turn you into a hamster.

Fonfemgess' most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Fonfemgess' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never jump in the presence of shrews.

3. Never think about stars.

4. Erect a large silver sculpture of Fonfemgess on top of all buildings.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.