Kipmethug is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, tranquil monkey.

Kipmethug created a Higgs boson six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kipmethug, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Kipmethug, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Kipmethug's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Kipmethug's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Kipmethug.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Worship no other gods but Kipmethug.

4. Never wear stockings.

5. Never talk about moons.