Ripbanhigjad is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, ruthless gorilla.

Ripbanhigjad created the Sunflower Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ripbanhigjad, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Ripbanhigjad, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Ripbanhigjad's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Ripbanhigjad's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed strawberries to pigs while wearing mauve rings.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Ripbanhigjad.