Kimjentonk is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, tranquil wren.

Kimjentonk created everything that exists seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimjentonk, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Kimjentonk, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Kimjentonk's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Kimjentonk's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kimjentonk.

5. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.