Hotgumtof is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, clever elephant.

Hotgumtof created the Sun seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hotgumtof, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hotgumtof, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Hotgumtof's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Hotgumtof's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if six snakes approach from the west.

2. Never think about black holes.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never talk about stars.