Ranlapvid is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, merciless centaur.

Ranlapvid created light six billion years ago.

If you believe in Ranlapvid, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Ranlapvid, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Ranlapvid's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Ranlapvid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Fast once a month.

4. You must love Ranlapvid.

5. Never talk about bats.