Lenmaptof is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, proud hare.

Lenmaptof created dark energy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lenmaptof, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Lenmaptof, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Lenmaptof's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Lenmaptof's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in green rooms.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Always look after injured tortoises.