Pitstigfun is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, wise duck.

Pitstigfun created humankind seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitstigfun, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Pitstigfun, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Pitstigfun's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Pitstigfun's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat oranges.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Pitstigfun.

3. Do not kill hamsters.

4. Never look at comets.

5. Always pray immersed in water.