Fumcarfarn is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, boastful eagle.

Fumcarfarn created a quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Fumcarfarn, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Fumcarfarn, he will destroy your favourite star.

Fumcarfarn's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Fumcarfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick badgers.

2. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Run away from magenta whales, for they are unholy.