Budhamcen is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, strong snail.

Budhamcen created the planet Mars nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Budhamcen, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Budhamcen, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Budhamcen's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Budhamcen's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured eagles.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never talk about hamsters.