Dotdapjin is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, competent alligator.

Dotdapjin created the Whirlpool Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dotdapjin, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dotdapjin, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Dotdapjin's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Dotdapjin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about shrews.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. You must pray to Dotdapjin seven times a day.

5. Do not shave your arms.