Hasneglarg is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, smart clam.

Hasneglarg created the planet Saturn seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hasneglarg, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Hasneglarg, she will turn you into a sheep.

Hasneglarg's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Hasneglarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. You must never eat apples.

4. Never go into orange rooms.

5. Never play with disobedient children.