Flantikbon is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, all-powerful deer.

Flantikbon created a quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flantikbon, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Flantikbon, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Flantikbon's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Flantikbon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not hurt nematodes.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

5. Always wear violet.
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