Flammaptal is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, self-assured pig.

Flammaptal created the planet Jupiter two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flammaptal, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flammaptal, it will send minions to preach to you.

Flammaptal's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Flammaptal's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Hide if six capybaras approach from the west.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never eat apples.

5. Always stare at clouds.